matrescence: the process of becoming a mother

Matrescence is the physical, psychological, and emotional process of becoming a mother, comparative to adolescence and the menopause. This process encompasses profound changes in your identity, relationships, body, hormones, brain function and just about every aspect of your life, from pregnancy and birth and into motherhood, for birthing and non-birthing mothers.

The term was first coined by anthropologist Dana Raphael in the 1970’s, to acknowledge and help normalise the complex and often challenging transformation that takes place after the arrival of a child, whether through birth, adoption, or surrogacy. This recognition provides important validation for the experiences many mothers face during this time of transition, and definitely helped me!

During pregnancy, the body experiences immense and profound physical changes, including the development and growth of the placenta, which is a completely new and temporary organ (weighing on average 1.5 pounds). The placenta shares cells between the mother and baby during pregnancy. These baby’s cells remain nestled within the mother's body—in various organs, tissues, and even the brain—for many years, and possibly for her entire lifetime. This fascinating phenomenon is known as microchimerism, which means the mother carries parts of her child inside her long after birth has occurred, and vice versa. The pelvis also adapts to the growing baby, the bones actually moving and separating to accommodate birth, returning only after birth, if at all. These are only a small insight into what is happening during pregnancy.

Researchers have found that new mothers, birthing and non-birthing, experience a notable increase in grey matter – a specific type of brain tissue – in several important areas of the brain, including the prefrontal cortex. Your prefrontal cortex, which is responsible for essential functions like decision making, planning, and prioritising, actually becomes larger and more developed, which is one of the reasons why mothers are exceptionally skilled at multi-tasking! The amygdala, the brain area that controls fear, also gets bigger. We become better at spotting danger, able to walk into a room and immediately calculate the potential risks. Unfortunately this can also work overboard, leading to intrusive thoughts which can become distressing in themselves and can lead to extreme anxiety in some cases.

In the UK, matrescence, despite being a profoundly transformative experience, is still not widely recognised or afforded the respect and understanding it truly deserves. It is important to acknowledge that as many as 20% of women develop mental health problems during pregnancy, or within the first year of motherhood. These challenges can range from mild to moderate and severe conditions, including depression, anxiety, post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), and psychosis. I will always remember my midwife who, on at least 2 occasions, told me that some women are compelled to abortion, unable to live with the physical and mental impact from their pregnancy. Around 30,000 women per year are affected by severe morning sickness, known as hyperemesis gravidarum, which often results in hospital admissions, leaving women unable to function normally in their daily lives and often lasting throughout the whole pregnancy. Although we are beginning to understand through research the cause of why this affects some women and not others, it is still a hugely under funded and under researched area.

The likelihood of experiencing depressive episodes can be as much as twice as high during the period of matrescence, for both birthing and non-birthing mothers, compared with other stages in a woman’s life. This increased risk is even more pronounced for women of colour, those belonging to disadvantaged socioeconomic groups who face systemic health inequalities, and women who have endured significant loss. Alarmingly, suicide remains the leading cause of death for women in the perinatal period, spanning from six weeks up to one year after giving birth, within the UK.

Matrescence, is all its beauty and wonder, is also brutal, unpredictable and life changing. No pregnancy is the same, no birth is the same, no child is the same, and no mother is the same. There are so many things I did not know before I became pregnant, a lot of people say to me if women knew how hard it was they wouldn't do it. But we do. Again and again. So I don’t think it is only talking about the bad bits, or the good bits, but an open, honest and raw conversation is needed for a deeper understanding of all of it, so we can support all women properly and unbiasedly during this time.

Supporting links & advice:

https://www.theguardian.com/books/2023/jun/29/matrescence-by-lucy-jones-review-the-birth-of-a-mother
https://maternalmentalhealthalliance.org
https://www.stylist.co.uk/health/women/matrescence-meaning-early-motherhood-advice/937902
https://www.nature.com/articles/s41398-021-01663-6
https://bjgp.org/content/62/603/e671
https://pregnancysicknesssupport.org.uk/get-help/what-is-hyperemesis-gravidarum/